Hamilton parents pay tribute to Josh Elmes, one of four victims in Bochara car crash

Lee Ann has started a charity fundraiser to help cover costs of the funerals with any leftover money to help set up a drop-in centre in Hamilton for the city's young people who are struggling to come to terms with the loss of four lives.

They are sharing their story about their precious son to get the message about road safety out while urging young people to seek help for mental health in the wake of the accident at Bochara that left a fifth person injured.

"We want to leave a legacy for the kids. We don't want this to be an end to young lives that doesn't go anywhere," Lee Ann said.

"Yes our boy is not here. We can't bring him back. My concern is that the youth of this town are going to be hit hard. I want people to get around them. That's what we need to do. We can't lose any more youth in town.

"We need to get our arms around them and we need to support them. That's what Josh would want. That's what anyone in that car would want."

Josh, a student at Monivae College, was just 15 when he died. He doted on his five-year-old sister Jemma and his younger brother Aaron, 12.

He loved to play drums, riding motorbikes on his grandparents' property, camping and the army cadets.

Josh had already reached the rank of sergeant and in December would have become a warrant officer at a marching out parade at Pukapunyal. "People have to salute him so he was looking forward to that," Matt said.

He was passionate about drumming, and even while in class at school he would hear drum beats in his head and be writing down the beats so when he got home he could practice them.

This helped Josh with getting frustrations out. Matt wants to apologise to his neighbours for the noise but it is a sound, now that Josh is gone, they will miss.

Josh dreamt of owning his own farm one day.

"We found something he'd written on his computer where his dream was to have a 1000-acre farm," Matt said.

"He wanted to get married and have two kids, a motorbike track and a horse-riding track. He wanted to teach his kids all he knew."

The discovery of the words he'd written on his computer in January of his dreams and vision for his life in 10 years' time are both heartwarming and heart-wrenching.

"I'm grieving but I know everyone else is grieving, a lot of people around town are grieving," Lee Ann said.

"It's a parent's worst nightmare to lose a child. I know I sound strong but I'm not really. It's my faith."

The primary school teacher said her strong Christian faith was helping her cope with the loss.

"I know he is in a better place," she said.

Matt, a care worker, said they were just so thankful the last event Josh attended was a Christian youth event.

The couple brought Josh and younger brother Aaron to Warrnambool - along with a busload of other children - for the Youth Alive event at Kardinia Church on Friday night, which hundreds of youth from across the region attended.

With another scheduled for Horsham this weekend, the couple is urging young people to consider going to events like that.

They also want to see a youth drop-in centre in the young ones' memory set up up in Hamilton - maybe run through Southern Grampians Shire with some volunteers - to give all youths something to do.

"Just so the young people have something to do other than go to Macca's or KFC," Matt said.

"Something that will let their legacy live on but in a good way," Lee Ann said.

Matt said they had been overwhelmed with the support they had received from the community.

"There has been a lot of support in the schools and the community and I just want to say 'thank you'," he said.

Matt said many friends had reached out to say how much of a support Josh had been to them.

Lee Ann said Josh had his own mental health struggles, but he was using his experiences to help others.

She said she wanted the message to get out about seeking help for mental health.

"If you have issues, seek help."

They said Josh was getting better after being diagnosed and medicated for ADHD, but he needed more help.

They also want to drive home the road safety message.

Matt's message to young ones who were looking for a "thrill" or "adrenaline rush" was go to a theme park or skydiving where it was safe.

"When you are driving a car you need to follow the rules, wear a seatbelt and follow the speed limit," he said.

On Thursday, less than two days before the accident, he had had a conversation with Josh and Aaron about road safety.

"I said to the boys 'just don't get into a car with someone you know is erratic'. And Josh looked at me and said 'I'm not that stupid Dad'," Matt said.

"A day later he did get into the car."

Matt said he was glad he had that conversation and could say at least he tried to do something.

He said he would treasure one of Josh's last Facebook posts wishing a happy birthday to "the most amazing dad".

Lee Ann's last words to Josh on Friday before she went to bed were "I love you lots", and she gave him a big hug.

And when she later heard him walk out the door, she called him. Josh said he was just going for a walk and he would see her soon.

"I told him 'don't be late'. That was the last time I heard from him," she said.

You can donate to the My Cause fundraiser here.

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